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Unread 10-19-2005, 10:58 PM   #1
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I am a BT who is living a frum life now....(I dress according to tzinius, am shomrei shabbos, and have immersed myself in Yiddishkeit and can't imagine living any other way.)

Another BT told me that because I am a schwartze, the chances of my making a shidduch is nil. She says that Frum people don't marry schwartzes, even if they are Jewish. (My Mameh is as was my Tateh (z''l) I know that finding a shidduch with my background will be hard, but I just need some encouragement that I will soon meet my bashert.

I know that this sounds like a mishegoss, and I'm not sure if this is even in the correct area of the forum, yet, I don't have any idea where else to put this.
Have a peaceful and joyful Sukkos!
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Unread 10-19-2005, 11:07 PM   #2
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I know several "schwartes" who come from a BT/Ger background who are married with families, B"H, . . . don't worry -your beshert is out there, don't let the close mindedness of others upset you. We all have nisyonos in life, things take time and it's always easy (I'm sure you know all of this from experience) ust fight it out and keep strong.
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Unread 10-19-2005, 11:15 PM   #3
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First of all, whats a "shwartze"? Second of all, if you know you did the right thing, (by becoming frum), why are you worrying? Do the best you can, and put your worry's in G-ds hands, and He will do the rest.

G-d has made a life partner for you, and She/He is out there somewhere, waiting for you. You don't have to worry about what others say. I'm not talking from much experiance here, so I hope I'm helping.

Some practical encouragement: both my parents are BT, so maybe that would work? If you married another BT, like yourself? Then you'd feel comfortable with eachothers backgrounds, and you'd even be able to help eachother grow. (I hope this is not offending you.)

And no, this doesn't sound like a "mishogoss". It sounds like a person in need of reassurance. So I hoped this helped. All I can say is, hold in there. When the time is ripe, you WILL meet the person who is right for you. And when that happens, well, MAZAL TOV!
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Unread 10-19-2005, 11:40 PM   #4
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i.e. a shvartza . . . someone who is black.
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Unread 10-20-2005, 12:50 PM   #5
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don't worry!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
anyone who says no cos of a reason like that is simply not 4 u.
Hashem has a plan 4 u, and evri1 has a bashert and ull find yours.
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Unread 10-20-2005, 08:36 PM   #6
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I admire you for the strength you had when you became frum. Many of us aren't faced with such a hard change. I am confident that you will find a loving chosson. We learn that when a 40 days before a baby is born Hashem decided who that persons bashert will be. Everybody has one, and as long as you remember that you have reason to believe that you to will have a match, literally, made in heaven. Much Hatzlacha.
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